March?

For those who are asking about the whole fertility thing and why I haven't done more to take charge of the situation, I wanted to let you know that it looks like March may be it!

I went to a Reproductive Endocrinologist back in June. I walked in scared and clueless and I walked out loaded with pamphlets, prescriptions, test procedure prescriptions, condoms, cups, birth control pills and pages of handwritten notes. All of these things were hilariously placed into an Enfamil plastic bag for me so I actually looked like I was walking out of my first pregnancy appointment.

The descriptions of the procedures and their cost scared the shit out of me. Her "plan" was to give Ziggy a sperm analysis (hence the condom and cup), put me on progesterone to bring a period, then put me on birth control and antibiotics for a month, give me an hsg in that month, then after we got all of the tests, barring no further findings, we would proceed with a highly monitored injectibles cycle (daily shots of fertility drugs) once my period came after the birth control pill cycle ended.

Total cost over those two months of tests/procedures - about $4,000 out of pocket since lovely Louisiana does not have mandatory fertility coverage like more progressive states do.

I was scared to even dicuss the "plan" with Ziggy. It was then that we decided to wait at least 6 months, give God a little more time, before proceeding.

So here we are at the 6 month mark. In the car tonight, out of the blue, Ziggy asked me if I could pick up a small pack of condoms at the store. He said that he wanted to practice with the feel of a condom so that he wouldn't be all freaked out by it and not be able to "perform" and waste the $13 condom that we got from the RE.

I looked at him and said, "um, sure, so does this mean?" And he said, "yes, it means that I'm ready for the testing." So we agreed to go au naturale through March since we have a lot going on with birthdays, holidays, Luke's 1st Reconciliation, Mardi Gras, sports, taxes and all that stuff.

So, March, it is. I can't believe that we're going to actually do all this. I'm scared and excited all at the same time. We're going to go ahead and knock out his SA in January. That's the easiest part of the whole process anyway and hearing that he is "normal" will both help us breathe easier (IF he's normal, oh please God let him be normal).

It would be so much easier for me to deal with being the "problem" than it would be for him.

So that is that. Now...if only God would intervene in between now and March??? Please???