Word Quota

I swear that I am a flashing billboard for people who have not used up their word quotas for the day.

What do I mean? I attract EVERY chatty human on earth - not just chatty, but the types who sit and tell you their ENTIRE life stories and don't realize that your head is becomming dislocated from sitting there and nodding for so long to make it appear that you care - THOSE people.

It's like someone handed out word quotas and then pointed to me and said - there's your girl, go get her!

Tonight at football practice I actually sat and texted my husband FOUR times with the following text while a man told me ONE story that lasted the ENTIRE hour long practice (NOT AN EXAGERRATION). I texted, "please help me". And my husband would try (piss poor attempts though, if you ask me). He would walk over and try to get himself into the conversation to free me long enough to walk off or become engaged with the next talker waiting in line for my ear. Didn't work.

I think that most people I meet believe that I am mute because they talk so much that they never hear a word out of me.

There are very few exceptions to this rule. Lan will allow me to talk my own head off as will a select few others - very few others. But for the most part, from my mother in law to the pill poppin football moms - I am nothing more than a mirror for them to practice their life stories in front of.