Just big blobs of fat

Interesting things seen or heard today:

First - most interesting thing seen award goes to....the poo thumb print on the roll of toilet paper in Luke's bathroom. While I KNOW that the poo thumbprint belonged to my 8 year old, I am praying that the act of pooing actually occurred immediately before his bath and not at any other time of day.

Second - most interesting thing heard today award goes to....again to Luke with a fabulous tie. I just love this commercial on TV lately where a bunch of 10 to 13 year olds tell their parents to talk to them about sex. The commercial is ALL over the TV and no channel is safe from it. I've seen it with Luke in the room at least 10 times this month.

Today, I asked Luke, "Well, do you want to go ahead and talk about sex since this commercial keeps saying that we should?"

Luke's reply was, "No, why would we. I mean, you've never had sex, and I never plan on having sex, so why would we talk about it."

And that friends, is the first funniest thing I heard all day.

I said, "Well, son, remember how we talked about eggs and seeds and how moms and dads need to hug and kiss to get the eggs and seeds to meet eachother." (WHAT? It was a book that came HIGHLY recommended when his stepmother got pregnant by his own pediatrician! Don't judge me, I was trying.)

Luke said, "I guess so."

I said, "Well Luke, all that hugging and kissing? Well, that IS sex - that's what it is. You got any questions?"

Luke said, "Nah, I just don't understand why grown up men like boobies so much...I mean, all they are is a big blob of fat - who wants to grab all over blobs of fat?"

Momentary silence.

"OH MY GOD MOMMY, YOU HAD SEX WITH ZIGGY TO MAKE THAT BABY?"

And that, friends, is the second funniest thing I heard all day.

I should have posted the funniest thing heard yesterday which was Luke learning at the dinner table that Ozzie talks and acts so weird from years of too many drugs. Luke thought that it was all of the loud music and cursing that made him like that.

Hey now, I just realized that I talked to my son about sex and drugs - both of them - in one week. Ah, I feel like I need a pat on the back from the creators of totally inappropriate commercials everywhere. Thank god he wasn't paying attention during that Tampax commercial earlier!