Pissed off

Since I am on fake progesterone, I get the complete right to be in a pissy bitchy mood even though I am currently experiencing something that I've prayed for daily for 17 months, right? RIGHT?

List of things pissing me off at this moment:

1.) I haven't gained a pound, but none of my pants are buttoning because I'm so bloated.

2.) I am pissing out of my ass. I've had water shits for days and I'm now praying for that pregnancy constipation that I've heard so much about.

3.) People who wear velvet pants to work and think that they pass as dress pants.

4.) The 10 people in my family who are twice my age, but act like less than half my age.

5.) My husband isn't home and I'm dizzy from the pm progesterone pill and I have laundry to fold and lunches to make and clothes to iron and Luke's homework to finish and I am NOT a person who can ever just put those things to the side to rest. I literally can't rest until it's all done.

6.) The government. I won't embellish, but they are just pissing me off.

7.) My hair - I'm about 6 weeks past the desperate need for coloring and my roots are so gray that I look about 45 and I should have gotten off my lazy ass and colored my hair weeks ago so I wouldn't be stuck with these roots for 6 more weeks.

8.) I'm too tired and dizzy every night to shave and I am turning into a french maid, but not the sexy kind, just the fat hairy kind.

Anyway, YES, I am so grateful and thrilled to be where I am and I would cut off toes to stay where I am - but this progesterone can mess with your mind, man. Seriously.

I could have gone on with my bitch fest, but I don't want to seem whiney.