I'm crushin...

I know it's been a while since I posted - forgive me. I've been trying to figure out how to word this post correctly to ensure the least amount of frowns and disapproving eyes.

Here it is - I have learned the power that a crush can have on your marriage...for the better, people!

See, I have this really strange crush - it is on a man who is NOT attractive at all. No, seriously - I have no physical attraction to him - NONE. But for some reason, I constantly find myself crushing on this guy to a point where I have had dreams about him. Anyone that I have told about this crush has either laughed at me or made nasty "ew" faces at me.

So why do I crush on him? No clue. I would NEVER cheat on my husband or even think about cheating on him. In fact, the crush is totally non-sexual. I've never had a sexual thought about this man - ever! (Except that one dream...but I can't be held responsible for that, right?!) It's just a crush as in - he has a fabulous sense of humor and he's a good time and I love to be around him kind of thing - he is wildly funny and the life of the party and he cracks my husband up too, and we both just love the guy. I just love to be around him...not "alone" around him - just around him in general.

So this weekend - I spent an unusual amount of time with or near or in some vicinity as him. On Saturday night, we had a girls' night out for all the football moms, and his wife was with us, so he wound up being a regular part of the conversation. Then on Sunday there was a barbecue at another football mom's house and he was there the whole time. Add in a little football, some hot grilled meat and a beer or two - and it was a damn good time! It may have been the best time that Ziggy and I have had together with a group of other couples in a long damn time.

Mr. Crush loves to mess/flirt with me because I'm a moron who blushes uncontrollably and embarrasses easily, and I guess this is fun for him. It's totally innocent, so don't fret. Anyway, this flirting that he does with me - or this "joshing" that he does - must be a totally huge turn on for...MY HUSBAND. I don't know why - maybe because some other dog is sniffing his hydrant, but he has been all over me - huggin, kissin, holdin hands, complimentin - being sweet with me.

In turn, the joking/flirting has given me this unusual self esteem boost (I'm normally the low self esteem title holder) and I feel kind of good lately - a bit prettier - a bit spunkier - a bit...dare I say...sexier. And my husband reaps all the benefits of that.

And here I am now at work doing something I have NOT done in a long time - I'm longing for my husband! Literally, longing for Ziggy - the way I did when we first started dating. I just want to talk to him or text or email or be together in any kind of way that I can and I'm feeling all giddy about when I will see him in a few hours after work. I'm actually giddy with anticipation of being next to him, my husband, again. WTF?

These feelings are NOT normal - my marriage is very comfortable and relaxed - sure we love each other, but we passed up those puppy love days years ago. We're now more like close business partners who have sex a couple times a week and know each other's secrets. I honestly don't even think I felt like this on my actual wedding day - but now I do!

What the hell? I can't explain it - but all I know is that I can thank my son's football coach for not only teaching my son the perfect 3-point stance - but for also pouring a little spice into my marriage???

I've read in magazines before that a little careful crush can actually help a marriage - but I never believed it until now.

Must. Get. Work. Done.